


At Least There's This

by pinkdrinksandmusic



Category: Captive Prince - C. S. Pacat
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Canon, damen's feeling a little lonely and laurent comforts him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-04
Updated: 2019-02-04
Packaged: 2019-10-22 00:57:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17652962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinkdrinksandmusic/pseuds/pinkdrinksandmusic
Summary: There was a certain loneliness that came with being King.





	At Least There's This

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by the beginning of Kings Rising. It always stood out to me just how lonely Damen is in it, despite having been reunited with his countrymen and even his oldest friend. There’s a sadness there not only in his longing for Laurent, but in how alone he is, and how that’s a part of being a king to him. I wanted to go a little into that so…here we go!

Damen and Laurent had a very important rule that they made sure was never broken: never bring work into the bedroom.

Their lives were taken over by being kings, well on their way to being emperors. There were days, weeks, where they got the very bare minimum of sleep. There were people who had once been Damen’s friends, close to his equals, who were now his subjects.

Even his oldest friend, Nikandros, wasn’t free of this, treating Damen as his king first and his friend second. Gone were the days Nikandros would greet him with a hug, a slap on the back, and playing catch up with each other’s personal lives. Now conversations about their personal affairs were few and far in between. Damen hadn’t even known Nikandros had gotten engaged until long after it had happened, hadn’t even known he’d gotten a lover. When Nikandros came to see him, it was always about matters of the country. There was rarely ever time for anything else and even then, it was just a few quick words before they had to return to their duties. Nikandros, as Kyros, was also a busy man himself and didn’t have a lot of free time to spare.

This loneliness was expected. Damen had been raised with the knowledge that this would happen eventually. He had felt it right away, when he first took his place as king, on the march toward Ios against his brother. The ride had been filled with nights by himself, writing letters, then nights swinging a sword until he could barely move.

Until Laurent came into his room, offering him comfort for his lost family and held him, something he hadn’t been given as an adult and never thought to ask for.

In that sense, he was luckier than most kings, including his father. He had a partner, a true equal, who would stand at his side for the rest of his days. He had someone to turn to, to hold and be held by, to say whatever he wished to in their private conversations, someone to help him work out his issues.

And when they retired to their room, they were no longer kings. They were just themselves. Just Damen and Laurent. They could let their shoulders drop, they could sigh and yawn in exhaustion, they could let their weaknesses show without concern.

Their nights were dictated by their day. Some nights, they had enough energy to partake in some enjoyment before bed. Laurent would dress down into his sleeping clothes and curl up by the fire to read with his goblet of water beside him, and Damen would sometimes work out a little bit, read something himself, go out to the balcony to enjoy the fresh air, or have some wine. They would spend this time together, but doing their own separate thing to unwind.

Other nights ended with them hungry for each other. They’d enter their room with their hands on each other, undressing in a frenzy, losing themselves in desperate love making. The way that they made love depended greatly on their mood, but they always knew how it would be as soon as they entered the room. Damen knew how Laurent wanted it in how he kissed him, whether it was hard and wanting or soft and sweet. Damen would show Laurent with how he touched and moved him. They both responded to each other and always found themselves in sync.

Then there were nights like this, where they entered their room so bone tired that the idea of doing anything but crashing into bed and passing out wasn’t realistic.

Damen had it easy. Wearing only a chiton, he was undressed and in bed immediately. Laurent, with all his laces, took more time. Whereas Damen lost his chiton long before he got into bed, Laurent had gotten to the bed and fell back into it long before he had finished undressing. He had gotten his boots off somewhere between the door and the bed and was now kicking his pants off his legs with a grunt of annoyance.

Damen watched in mild amusement.

“I’m never wearing pants again,” Laurent said after finally kicking them off.

“You’ll hear no complaints from me,” Damen mumbled into his pillow. He was laying on his stomach with his head turned toward Laurent.

“You could help, since you dismissed the servants,” Laurent said.

With a groan, Damen pushed himself up. Laurent also moved so he was sitting up, so Damen could untie the laces of his jacket and undershirt and help him out of it. Once he helped Laurent out of his clothes, they got under the covers. Out of habit, they both moved to their sides and pressed together so that Damen was spooning Laurent. It was so natural that they did it without conscious thought.

Once, Laurent had told him that when he climbed into bed when Damen was already asleep, Damen would immediately wrap him up in his arms without waking. Laurent did this as well. If Damen went to bed after Laurent had fallen asleep, Laurent always rolled over to him, their bodies in tune with each other even in sleep.

It was strange. Now that Damen was in bed he couldn’t sleep, even though he was still exhausted. His body ached with it.

“How did your meeting with Berenger go?”

“Mm. I’ll tell you tomorrow. No politics in bed.”

Of course. Their rule. They did break it, now and then, but it was always at their leisure and never while they were in bed. If they were to break it, it would be at the table over water – or sometimes wine, in Damen’s case. They only did this with pressing matters that weighed heavily on them. Things they weren’t ready to share with anyone outside of each other. Luckily, it wasn’t often they needed the space or the privacy for it.

“I can’t sleep.”

Laurent turned in his arms so they were facing each other. His fingers were gentle on Damen’s cheek.

“Are you lonely?”

“A little,” Damen admitted, not bothering to ask how Laurent could tell when he always could. “People who I had been friends with,” Damen paused, searching for his words, “They treat me as someone else now. It’s just different. Everything is.”

His heart felt heavy as he spoke.

“They would give their lives for you.”

“As their King.”

“They would have given their lives for you before that.”

“It’s changed.”

“For the both of us.”

“Yes.” Then Damen asked, “What about you? Are you lonely?”

“Not really, no, but I’ve never been as much of a people person as you, so it’s different for me. Being a king has been stressful in ways I didn’t anticipate, not entirely, but it’s preferable over how things were before.”

Damen didn’t often think about it, how it was for Laurent in Arles after the war. He did now. His loneliness was nothing in comparison, but he was wise enough to not compare.

“Things are busy now, but they’ll calm down soon enough. When they do, we can throw a party, something small and simple,” Laurent said.

“Don’t want to go out in disguise?”

“We always do what I want when we have the time.” Laurent smiled softly. “You always go along with my whims and plans.”

“I like that you tell me them.”

“I tell you everything now.”

“Do you?”

“You always look for an earful of talk when it comes to how I think and feel about you.”

Damen smiled and kissed Laurent’s shoulder, helplessly. His heart felt lighter the more they talked. Laurent shuffled closer to him and Damen held him closer to his body, enjoying the feel of him.

It was so easy to lose himself in Laurent, to forget everyone and everything with Laurent in his arms.

Damen liked it. This was what made the loneliness of being a king bearable. He didn’t have to face it alone, and therefore was not truly alone. He wasn’t sure if he would ever get to a point where he didn’t miss those simple days of his youth, where he was more carefree and on more equal footing to those around him.

Laurent’s friendship, his companionship, his comfort, his words, his ear – he gave so much and so freely to Damen.

Laurent’s presence was like a shining star beside him, as beautiful beautiful light of the moon. His love and devotion to Damen and what they were building as endless as the sky.

“Feel better?” Laurent asked after awhile of comfortable silence. He placed little kisses along Damen’s jaw until Damen caught his mouth, kissing him with feeling, until Laurent let out a small sound that almost made him want to roll on top of him, but they were too tired for that tonight. Tomorrow. Tomorrow he would make love to Laurent in the way that he liked. In the way he always deserved.

Laurent hummed in sleepy pleasure when the kiss ended. Damen pressed their foreheads together and their noses bumped.

“I’m looking forward to that party.”

“I know it won’t be the same and that things have changed, but your best and most exciting years are still ahead of you. You’ll have fun and be surrounded by friends. I’ll see to it.”

“Thank you.” He turned Laurent in his arms so he was spooning him again. Laurent pressed back against him and settled comfortably in his arms.

“Sure you don’t want to be the little spoon tonight?” Laurent asked, his voice only a little teasing.

“Tomorrow.”

“Alright,” Laurent said, breaking off at the end to yawn.

“Goodnight. Laurent.”

**Author's Note:**

> That "Your best years are still ahead of you" line is from an episode of HIMYM. I loved that talk between Marshall and Lily d;aireoiueh I didn't intend to add it and debated against it, but I think it fits well enough. 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it! <3 
> 
> Find me at [tenderkings](https://twitter.com/tenderkings)


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